I don't really know what to write, as i'm still in shock. Less than a week after losing her brother Zowie, tonight we lost Viv :(

Viv had a very nasty facial abscess that we'd treated, and that had burst, and we were keeping it clean, but it was so deep that it went right through her mouth :( . It seemed to be getting better, but then she developed a second one on her cheek that was making her eye bulge, and pushing her teeth out of place. She was a sorry sorry sight, and the poor little darling was in a fair bit of pain, despite her meds and constant care and cleaning. She regularly picked at her wounds, and they would bleed a lot, and she couldn't clean herself properly :( the last day or so she's been looking like all the joy has gone from her world, and like the light had left her eyes. We knew today it was time for her to say goodbye.

Viv was our first Russian Silver. The rat that made us fall head over heels for this variety, and desperately want to improve on their health and longevity. Viv was perfect in every way. Never a nasty second, always cuddly, and licky and soft. She was one of our first pair of breeding does, though we never bred from her, although she did become an aunty to Peaches' and Sharky's babies.

Everyone who met her said how perfect her temperament was, and how beautiful her colour and soft her coat. She was just fabulous in every way, and i am totally, utterly devastated. This feels much the same as losing Mickey, and it hasn't even really sunk in yet.

Viv wowed everyone at this year's Bexley show by winning Best Pet, and so it seems only fitting that we've found a gorgoeus trophy to have for best pet trophy at Cardiff show... and we'll be calling it the Vivace Trophy.

I need to thank Jon and Kathy for letting me have this wonderful, special, vibrant, adorable, perfect, lovely girl... because now she's gone I simply do not know what I'll do without her. It's like a piece of me is missing too somehow, and I'm dying inside. :(

For Viv:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3zkAgrMfoc4

Afterglow [of your love] - Small Faces:

I'm happy just to be with you
And loving you the way I do
It's everything I need to know
Just resting in the afterglow of your...

Love,love is all around me
Everywhere
Love has come to touch my soul
With someone who really cares
No one can deny us
People who once passed me by
Will turn their heads 'round

I'm happy just to be with you
And loving you the way I do, yeah
It's everything I need to know
Just resting in the afterglow of your love

You
Yes you have always been here
Feeling deep inside
A feeling that I could not see
Or touch, or try to hide
My love is in and around you
I bless the day that I found you
So listen up baby

I'm happy just to be with you
And loving you the way I do, yeah
It's everything I need to know
Just resting in the afterglow of your love

Love is like a voice in my head
Keeps turning 'round the things that we said

I'm happy just to be with you
And loving you the way I do, yeah
It's everything I need to know
Just resting in the afterglow of your love